Of course you are free to support abusive behavior but especially with friends and family it would probably be useful for your own sake not to do so, and it is factually correct to view (and treat) you as enabler if you continue to do so despite knowing about the abuse.
I don’t care how things started. If someone wants to chop my head off and has shown evidence of chopping the heads off of people of my tribe, I will try to beat them first
But you do you.
